Carolyn Chapelle Tell A Friend About Us:

Embracing My Femininity ~ By Carolyn Chappelle

G rowing up I was surrounded by men--two brothers and my dad and male cousins. I did everything like them and disliked most things they disliked--namely women. The way women acted, spoke and so on. "Males being the superior sex, more intelligent..." is what I (falsely) identified with. So growing up, I was accepted more by boys and men because of my intellect and strengths. Of course once all grown up, you are then viewed as a woman because of your physical appearance. They are now looking at the physical attributes--beauty, breasts--and so I became the enemy, and I had to start dressing conservatively--more unlike a girl/woman--not to be noticed as a girl/woman.

Then as I got older and started to embrace the feminine qualities--deciding they will have to respect me as an intellect once I begin to speak--that's when the problems began. When you are dressed more conservatively, you are expected to be intelligent and to be able to formulate opinions of your own. However, when you are beautiful and wear make-up and feminine colors, or frills and heels, then men feel that you are telling them to look at you sexually--and not in an intellectual or business manner.

Unjustly, you get the title of "A Bitch" because you don't acknowledge their innuendos or advances or passes they may make at you. And then they are like 'oh, she takes her job too seriously.' The strange thing about it is that women who are typically the female stereo-types act like the guys by hating you because 'she's supposed to be one of us' and 'who does she think she is telling us what to do or putting in for that position and meeting with the president of the company...'

I have had enough of this nonsense from everyone. I just decided on the days that I am feeling very sexy that I would wear a short skirt or my heels or both. I would wear my button down blouse one button lower and wear it in pink or red--if I so choose. I would enjoy the fact that I'm feeling beautiful and sexy that day, and I'm going to let it show and just radiate throughout. As I pass men and women on that day, they will look at me and smile because they know--just by the look on my face, those heels, my hair being down or that pink shirt or red lipstick--that I'm feeling sexy and loving it. And I'm okay with that now. It takes nothing away from my intellect.

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